un -titled

I could never understand what made closed me trust another so much.
So much...
... that it hurt when a meaningless cut off happened to happen,
...that at times a doubt if one had not be seen as committed would it have been different,
..was it that the heart trained itself to strict boundaries because the head saw the other committed,
...why did it matter so much...the smile... the kindness...the ignoring..
...I who would double ignore when ignored was feeling pain...
..was I denying something within, something I never expressed thinking another committed...
...knew a little to late to ever break out of boundaries I had trained the head to follow,
...but then we never had noticed each other's special worlds...
...yet...
If it had been would he not have expressed it....
No...I push away the possibility...he never would see me beyond a smile and nod...
Kindness was his natural self...

But I always felt he carried someone in his heart..it was there in the quietness...the way he carried himself....the firmness of the footsteps...
All through the months I had thought it was his wife...after a mistaking realised I guessed he carried someone he loved...
Someone back home perhaps...
Whoever it was would be a blessed lady...
He was a man of firm character....one who would make a great dad and companion...
 I just know I had known someone I would never forget the rest of my life, perhaps till the grave and after.